Why is Online Dating So Hard for Guys

Online dating presents unique challenges for men compared to women. Here are some key reasons:

• A staggering 75% of registered users are male.
• Women tend to be more selective in their choices.
• A portion of female profiles are fake or not genuinely interested in dating.
• Paying users often have an edge over free users.

Does this mean men should give up on online dating? Absolutely not! Read on to discover why perseverance can still lead to success.

What You'll Learn

Keep reading to discover:

• Why men have it 13 times harder in the online dating world compared to women (backed up with actual data)
• The results of the average guy on dating apps
• Practical tips to boost your results
• How you can have 14 extra opportunities a year to meet someone special

Let's dive in!

The Online Dating Landscape for Men: A Reality Check

Before we get into the nitty-gritty, let's look at what online dating is like for guys.

It's a Numbers Game (and Not in Our Favor)

Here's the deal: most dating apps have way more men than women. We're talking about an 80/20 split in some cases. Talk about tough odds!

If we take a look at Statista's Tinder statistics & facts, we find that:

• 75% of registered users are male.
• 14% of people have purchased premium subscriptions.

On top of that, after using these apps for a while, you'll realize that:

• A few female profiles are bots trying to advertise something or scam you.
• Some women on these platforms are not really looking to date.
  • They are promoting their Instagram or OnlyFans profiles.

This imbalance creates a few challenges:

1. Women have significantly more options, making it harder for guys to stand out.
2. You are at a disadvantage if you are not paying for premium subscriptions. Premium user's profiles and swipes get priority.
3. It can be discouraging when you're not getting many matches or responses.

Numbers game continued

Thanks to Tinder Insights and our community, we also have the actual average statistics:

1. Men swipe right on 40% of the profiles they see.
2. Men match with 2.5% of people they swipe right on.
3. Men go on real-life dates with 7% of women they have matched with.
4. 33% of those dates go well, meaning both parties want to see each other again.

This means:

• To get a match, an average guy has to swipe right 40 times and 100 times total (left and right).
• To get one date, you need 14 matches, that's 560 right swipes or 1400 swipes total.
• To find good chemistry with someone, you need 3 dates, which is 42 matches, 1680 right swipes, 4200 swipes total.

Disclaimer: "Good chemistry" in the above section doesn't mean that you will surely find the love of your life in 3 dates. It simply means that you will at least have some connection with her, and you will see her multiple times.

Now that we've set the scene...

1. Stop comparing yourself to women

"It's unfair; women have it so much easier in dating!"

That's true. According to Tinder Insights:

• Women are pickier; they swipe right on only 7% of men on average.
• Women match with 33% of the people they swipe right on.

While we don't have data on women's match-to-date ratio, it's likely higher than men's. Even if it's the same as the average guy's, women would only need to swipe right 42 times to get a date.

That's achievable in a day.

But here's the important question: why focus on this comparison? This is the reality of the current online dating market. The average man needs to put in about 13 times more effort than the average woman. Accepting this fact is the first step to success.

Adjusting Your Expectations

Instead of getting discouraged, adjust your expectations. Setting up a new date might take a few weeks, but it will happen. Remember, these were all AVERAGE statistics. The average man doesn't put in much effort, which means it's not that difficult to stand out.

You will never get the same results as an average woman, but that comparison isn't helpful. As we discussed earlier, there are understandable reasons why women have more options and can be pickier. It's not anyone's fault; it's just how things are.

Focus on Your Own Progress

Stop comparing your results to women's. Instead, compare your results to your past self:

• Did you get more matches this month compared to last month?
• Did you have more quality conversations?
• Did you go on more dates?

These are the metrics that truly matter. By focusing on your own progress, you'll stay motivated and see real improvements in your online dating experience.

2. The average guy is not even trying hard

Here's a surprising truth: the average guy on dating apps isn't putting in much effort. Yet, they're still getting matches and going on dates. This is good news for you because it means the bar is set pretty low. Let's break it down:

Common Profile Mistakes

The average profile often includes:

• Poorly chosen photos (e.g., wearing sunglasses, face not clearly visible)
• A lacklustre or non-existent bio
• No listed interests or hobbies
• Generic, uninspired messaging

Despite these shortcomings, these profiles still yield some results. Imagine what you could achieve by putting in just a little more effort!

Your Competitive Advantage

By spending some time on profile optimization, you can easily stand out from the crowd.

We'll dive deeper into profile optimization in future posts, but even small improvements can lead to significantly better results.

Track Your Progress

After enhancing your profile:

1. Monitor your matches and interactions
2. See what seems to work well
3. Adjust your approach based on these insights

Remember, online dating is partly a numbers game but also about quality. By putting in a bit more effort than the average guy, you're not just playing the game – you're playing it smart.

Your results will significantly improve after you spend some time perfecting your profile. Then, track your results and see what worked and what didn't.

3. Are you living in a small town? I have bad news

Your location plays a crucial role in your online dating experience. If you're in a smaller town, you might face some additional hurdles. Here's why:

Again, it's a Numbers Game

Online dating success depends on having a large pool of potential matches. In smaller towns:

• Fewer registered users mean fewer potential matches
• You may exhaust your options more quickly
• The likelihood of finding compatible matches decreases

Population Threshold for Optimal Results

Our research suggests that online dating tends to work best in cities with:

• At least one million residents

The general rule is: the more people in your area, the better your chances of success.

Remember, online dating is just one tool in your social toolkit. Traditional ways of meeting people in smaller communities might still be more effective.

4. Be active on dating apps

Consistency is key in online dating. Swiping for a day or two and then giving up due to a lack of matches is a common mistake. Remember, it typically takes about 100 swipes to get one match, so patience is crucial.

Dating apps seem to reward regular activity with increased visibility. Aim to spend 10-15 minutes daily on each app you use, both swiping and messaging matches. This doesn't have to be a major time commitment – swipe while resting between gym sets, waiting in line, or taking a quick break from work.

Being active almost every day can significantly improve your results. It keeps your profile in circulation and increases your chances of making meaningful connections. So, make online dating a small but consistent part of your routine for the best outcomes.

5. Use multiple dating apps

The more apps you use, the more people will see your profile.

A wider net catches more fish. More apps mean more potential matches.

Sign up for at least two or three of the most popular dating apps in your country.

6. Paying for premium membership will help

Remember when we talked about that 14% of people have premium membership on Tinder?

• They have unlimited swipes a day
• Access to boosts and super likes
• Enhanced visibility (especially with Platinum)

While it's possible to achieve good results with free versions, a premium membership can significantly accelerate your success. If you have the means, it's worth considering.

However, a crucial caveat: Premium is not a magic fix. Before upgrading:

1. Ensure you're already getting matches with your free profile.
2. If you're not getting any matches, focus on optimizing your profile first.

Paying for premium won't help a profile that's not attracting attention. It's an enhancement, not a replacement for a well-crafted profile.

In short: Premium can boost good results, but it can't create them from scratch. Optimize first, then consider upgrading for faster progress.

7. Is it really that bad? Think long-term

Sure, 4200 swipes might sound daunting, but let's break it down:

Let's make it even more challenging. Imagine you're as selective as the average woman, swiping right on only 7% of profiles. In this scenario:

• You'd need about 24,000 swipes to reach 42 matches
• If you're on 3 different apps, swiping 100 times on each daily, that's 300 swipes a day
• At this rate, you could set up a date every 26 days

What does this mean in the long run? 14 dates a year.

That's 14 extra opportunities to meet someone special, just from swiping on your phone during downtime - while resting at the gym or even sitting on the toilet. These are 14 women you likely wouldn't have met otherwise.

It's absolutely worth the initial effort to create an outstanding profile. Once that's done, consistent swiping and messaging can yield significant results over time.

And again, these are the statistics for the average guy! You can do so much better!

Remember, online dating is a numbers game, but it's one that can pay off handsomely with patience and persistence.

Wrapping Up: You've Got This!

Online dating for men can be challenging, but it's far from impossible. By understanding the numbers game, avoiding comparisons with women's experiences, putting in consistent effort, optimizing your profile, using multiple apps, and considering premium memberships, you can significantly improve your chances of success. Remember, it's about playing the long game - those 14 extra dates a year can make a world of difference in your love life.

Ready to take your online dating experience to the next level? Sign up for SwipeLog today! Our platform allows you to easily track your progress across multiple dating apps, helping you identify what works and what doesn't. By monitoring your matches, conversations, and date outcomes, you'll gain valuable insights to continually refine your approach. Don't just play the dating game - master it with SwipeLog. Register now and start your journey to more meaningful connections!